So right now, Michael Phelps is America’s golden boy (and rightfully so). He’s the American hero of the Olympics, and what do Olympic heroes get? Endorsement deals! But uh-oh, Michael Phelps didn’t stick with the approved Wheaties brand, and he’s angered the obesity police.

You better eat your . . . Frosted Flakes?

Olympic legend Michael Phelps will appear on boxes of the Kellogg’s brand sugar cereal, drawing sharp criticism from health experts worried about the message he’ll be sending to children across America.

“I would not consider Frosted Flakes the food of an Olympian,” said nutritionist Rebecca Solomon of Mount Sinai Medical Center.

“I would rather see him promoting Fiber One. I would rather see him promoting oatmeal. I would even rather see him promoting Cheerios.”

The announcement yesterday that Phelps, 23, winner of a record eight gold medals at the Beijing Olympics, would grace Frosted Flakes and Corn Flakes boxes instead of the traditional athlete’s choice of Wheaties left many perplexed.

Frosted Flakes has three times the amount of sugar as Wheaties and 1/3rd the fiber.

This doesn’t matter much to a virtuoso swimmer who consumes 12,000 calories a day.

Still, in a country where childhood obesity is an alarming issue, Phelps’ iconic image sharing space with Tony the Tiger sends the wrong message, experts say.

“For a guy like Michael Phelps who isn’t worried about obesity because he’s burning thousands of calories as an athlete…eating Corn Flakes and Frosted Flakes every so often is not an issue,” Solomon said.

The Phelps-emblazoned cereal boxes hit supermarket shelves in mid-September.

This lady has so hit the nail on the head. The problem is not about how kids are too often sitting around playing video games all day, piling junk food into their mouths and getting zero exercise. The problem is that people like Michael Phelps and Tony the Tiger are luring these poor, innocent kids into these bad decisions! Doesn’t Michael Phelps realize he has a responsibility to the children?!

Look, I’m all for celebrities and famous athletes being good role models. But criticizing them over something as inane as which brand of cereal they choose to hawk is beyond ridiculous. Are these people really so stupid as to think that Michael Phelps will make normally thin kids stampede to the cereal aisles and gulp down bowl after bowl of Frosted Flakes, causing them to be suddenly obese? When I was a kid, my favorite cereals were not Fiber One or Wheaties (and especially not Wheaties), no matter who was on the box. I always heard about some famous athlete being on the Wheaties box, but it never made me actually want to eat Wheaties. I think the closest I got to something like that was when Cheerios came out with some kind of promotional “Olympic Team Cheerios”, with like… different kinds of Cheerios in there. Or something. But in any case, as a kid, I liked the sugary cereals best. You know… Cookie Crisp, and Count Chocula, and Fruit Loops, and stuff that would make this Rebecca Soloman have a heart attack. It didn’t matter to me one bit who was on the cover. And in any case, I’d have one bowl. What does she think is going to happen? That the Frosted Flakes is sprinkled with crack, making the kids greedily gulp down fifteen bowls at a time? Come on.

And since when do kids buy their own cereal anyway? It’s the parents who buy the food for their household, so if your little darling is breaking the scale in your bathroom, maybe you should try using that magic word no. Maybe you should try telling them to go do something active. Playing on their Wii does not count as active. I guess I don’t see the big deal, because while, yes, Frosted Flakes probably has tons of empty calories, if your kids are active and getting plenty of exercise, then it won’t matter. An Olympic champion can eat any kind of cereal they want, because they work their butts off (literally!). So you tell your kid that. “Yes, sweetie, Michael Phelps can eat Frosted Flakes, because he works really, really hard. If you work really, really hard, you can eat whatever you want, too.” And that would be because their going into a pool and swimming, or playing baseball, or ballet, or whatever, will be burning off those empty calories. What a novel idea!

And did the nutrition nazis ever stop the think that maybe endorsing a popular cereal with the kiddos might inspire more kids to be active than endorsing a cereal that kids don’t want to touch with a ten-foot pole? I mean, forcing your kids to eat Fiber One is like punishment. Going with Frosted Flakes gets Michael Phelps into the mainstream a lot more, very possibly inspiring more kids.

What these complaining idiots need to realize more than anything is that, ultimately, it isn’t Michael Phelps’ responsibility to ensure the proper eating and exercise habits of children. It’s up to the parents to make sure their kids are eating right and getting proper exercise. The obesity epidemic isn’t as complicated as a lot of people like to pretend it is. It’s really quite simple. Stop overanalyzing, and tell your kids to shut their mouths and get some exercise. The end.

Hat Tip: Melissa Clouthier

Feministing posted a… um… different video today about accepting fat people. Here it is:

Here are my thoughts.

The good points in this video are that you should accept people for who they are. You shouldn’t judge someone by what they look like. We don’t all have to look the same. Absolutely correct. The world is filled with very different, unique-looking people, and it makes the world a more beautiful place.

However, I have a point of contention.

While it’s great to have a positive body image, deciding that you’re just going to be happy as a fatso is not a good thing, and for only one reason: IT. ISN’T. HEALTHY. It is so incredibly bad for you to be overweight or obese! No one should hate themselves for it, but let’s be realistic here. The movement to just accept yourself as you are is a little bit defeatist and escapist if you’re a seriously overweight person. No one should lose a lot of weight just because our culture is obsessed with skinniness. They should lose weight for themselves. Being overweight or obese can lead to a much, much higher risk of heart disease, stage 2 diabetes, cancer, and a myriad of other health problems. If you’re an overweight person, it’s simply in your best interest to lose the weight, and there isn’t really an argument otherwise.

Now, let’s say that you don’t care about the health risks. Well, then, that’s fine for you. It’s your choice. Eat it up. My point in all of this is just that pretending that obesity is no big deal is misleading and harmful. It is a big deal, health-wise.

Does this mean I think that everyone should starve themselves and be a size 2? Uh, absolutely not. And I understand that it isn’t always easy to lose weight (I wish), especially as adults. You have a life, responsibilities. Getting to the gym or spending an hour cooking a healthy meal isn’t always easy, or all that appealing. But pretending that being overweight is no big deal is simply lying to yourself.

Yet, you do need to find a way to be happy with yourself regardless of your weight, because if you aren’t, then even as a size 2 you’re likely to be unhappy. The notion that you should just accept your weight, though, as part of “who you are” is dangerous. It’s like saying that being a smoker is “who you are”. It’s not, unless you have a drastic thyroid condition.

I think that part of this ideal concerning weight has a lot to do with the avoidance of responsibility attitude that permeates this country. It’s always someone else’s fault, truth is all relative, and if it makes you feel good, then do it. The whole idealogy is complete horseshit, and believe it or not, there are right and wrong choices, even if many Americans don’t want to admit it.